Bangkok Bank is the same way. My Branch is in Phichit there is no fee to withdraw money inside the bank of your own Branch. If I go to Bangkok and try to withdraw a large amount from inside the bank, there is a fee also I think it’s somewhere in the neighborhood of ฿200.
NonO based on married to a Thai is only 400k  which doesn’t apply to him because he can get the income verification certificate from the German Embassy in Bangkok
I don’t understand why they would be asking you for your TM 30 at immigrations upon entry into Thailand because it’s required to be filed within 24 hours of your arrival at your hotel or residence.
don’t know if this is true or not, but it could explain the reason why some banks will allow you an account and others will not. I was told that each bank is, while under the umbrella of a major bank, individually franchise, and it’s up to each branch manager how they operate. 
no you do not get anything actually delivered to an address. You only get the E Visa email to you. However, I believe the Thai regulations state that you must apply from a country in which you have residence
remember it’s 800 K each for the first year for the second year. You can each put in 65,000 each every month on the same day in an account in your name only. your husband will have to do the same so after you get your first year Ext start right then to depositing the money every month do not miss a month so for your second extension, you can show 12 consecutive payments 
I agree getting the non-O 90 day visa in your home country is the most advisable thing to do however, if you apply today if you are leaving in two weeks, and you apply for the visa today, you may not receive the visa before you leave, I know in the US on the Thai E Visa website it says to allow as much as 15 working days to receive your visa. I realize it rarely takes that long, but it’s something to consider. 
how could you possibly do that when American Airlines does not even fly into Thailand, what do you mean is you bought your tickets through American Airlines and then flew on a partner airline like JAL