You can try submitting an untranslated bank statement. I mean let's face it the information that's necessary is the name on the account, the account number and bank name, and the relevant amounts in the account. You can highlight these for the embassy, hopefully your name is in English on the account statement. You can try submitting that but be prepared to have translated version if they request translated English bank statement.
you have been banging your head against this wall for at least a week. There is no seasoning of the 800K funding requirement for an out of country non O based on being over 50. You simply show the money, you don't need to show it sitting in the account for x days, weeks, months.
It's true there is no income requirement but embassies may also request previous filed income tax returns and bank statements covering from 3 to 6 months that might show your financial stability as well as any incorporation papers if you have your own business
no seasoning requirement for the visa, only for the extension once inside Thailand, and the money will need to be seasoned in a Thai bank for the extension