@Terry ******

I’m not discussing that? Where did this context come from? 🏃🏼‍♀️ eek!

@Kent *******

also I didn’t accuse anyone of anything. I stated as a simple fact that when you’re in a room full of people with vast experience, though it may be varied, they will obviously be more familiar with the topic than the person just arriving. For the newbie to think they are instead going to educate everyone else, that is the very definition of arrogance.

@Kent *******

sir everything I said was incredibly balanced. What needs to be understood is that we don’t know what we don’t know and we will never know the level of poverty or the cultural pressure to care for one’s multigenerational family. I judged the man in question, but I did not judge any type person or any woman. you may take exception as you choose, but trying to highlight all aspects of a situation with a fair and even hand is not judgmental.

@Mark *******

it’s possible but not probable. There is far more poverty than there is anything resembling a financially independent middle-class. It’s just how it is. There is nothing wrong with those people operating from that place. And I guess there’s nothing wrong in us pretending it isn’t a factor.

I don’t really believe that people fall madly in love and stay together despite etc. etc.… For sure, a relationship of any type can start from necessity and a specific interest and then grow and evolve into something meaningful. No doubt! 👍🏼 so glad you found yours ✨ Slainte

@Todd ********

🙈 I had to too 👋🏼

@Mark *******

meanwhile you are fully aware that this story is the exception and not the rule. Congratulations on your happiness

You say you’re not naïve, but you can’t even spell the word… I’m not sure if naïve fits or there is a more compelling synonym, but my good sir, the mere fact that you are in a room filled with people with masses more experience than you in a very specific arena and you are scolding them and rejecting their input, so certain that you know what is what… That is folly, youthful arrogance, and willful ignorance… Not naïveté , not by a longshot.

Pride goeth before a downfall and this is exactly what you are about to experience. She is no doubt playing to your pride and vanity, an arrogant man is an easy mark- I was young once 👀 😂

I am by no means, and I’m sure many here or not either, besmirching the Thai people (if I can use that word in this context?) 🤔 the fact of the matter is that you cannot in your wildest dreams, conceive the weight of being responsible for taking care of multiple generations of your family in a climate of extreme poverty. Within the context of the society structure, how could I look down upon them!? But you really need to get square with that and understand that yes, there can be genuine, lovely people, and ALSO they are under immense pressure. We think we understand, but we cannot. Simply cannot. No frame of reference.

You could marry a lovely woman who would be nice and kind and faithful all your life. This does not mean she is unclear that she needs to marry into means. What’s lucky for you? Is that even if you are low on the totem pole financially, in the UK you are still a man of means to her. No one here that I have noticed has said they only want you for your money. That demonizes them. This is not about morality, it’s about survival and a lack of options. She may like you well enough and marry you but the money makes all the difference in the world for them- they aren’t overlooking that- because they can’t. We all want happiness, and for each other but let’s not pretend there isn’t a huge power imbalance.

Some years back I married a UK citizen- I’m American- the process to get me situated there was truly a nightmare to the point he just moved to the US. We had to give up, it was just ridiculous, and I’m American, employed and with financial means and a US passport.

@Lindsey ******

no. You made a statement as though it was fact. It was also a statement that gave no information. You’re right, it’s not a game. People shouldn’t just blurt stuff out. As has been repeated multiple times, it’s not the easiest thing in the world to get a legitimate work visa in Thailand specifically, unless you are a credentialed teacher. You made it sound like if you have a TEFL you can get a work visa. That’s just not the case. You can be as snarky as you like. Knock yourself out. 👍🏼

I asked you to clarify, you did - it’s sort of over at that point?

@Lindsey ******

oh- that’s confusing because you made a statement as tho it was a fact. There is no visa for teaching English. There are work visas for teachers. That’s a bit different than what I understood you to say 🤷🏻‍♀️👍🏼