you would need to submit your application to change to a non-o 90 day visa with more than 15 days remaining on your entry stamp and having transferred 800k into a Thai bank account. The fee is 2000thb for the 90 day non-o and then 1900thb for the year extension. If you are running short on time, you could buy a 30 day extension to your 60 day tourist visa first, 1900thb
The major benefit of the non-o vs over the non-oa is you don't need to have insurance cover (that meets Thai requirements) throughout your stay and for extensions. The non-o is much cheaper in the long run. Most long staying people over 50 find it easier to arrive on a 60 day tourist visa (NOT the Special Tourist Visa) then transfer that to a 90 day Non-o in country and meeting the requirements of depositing 800k into a Thai bank. You also don't have to leave every 90 days and you can draw that 800k down to 400k after you have a 12-month extension.
I think AFTER the you get the 90 day Non-O your wife could go to a nearby consulate and get the 90 day non-O using the marriage certificate and your 90 day Non-O as proof of why she wanted it.
sorry, I'm hearing from other people also confirming it's not possible to add a spouse to a retirement from a tourist visa in country. She would need to arrive on a 90 day non-o