for the record I just got it today at the first try, I didn't experience any translations issues and everyone was free to use the toilets as much as they wanted (some even left for an hour). Like you I recommend to practice an hour or two online on these free websites and also watch the 4 hours practice video before the test, it was boring but it cover almost all the answers of the test.
or you can practice online for free an hour by yourself. I just got it today today at the first try, 120 bahts for the medical report and 200 bahts for the residency, there is no need for any agent.
Anonymous participant closest is Malaysia but you cant go there. You could check Vietnam or Laos but I think that they all went online (e-visa) since a month. What you should is to check the thai embassy in Israel, check if you can apply online (from here), then if you get it you will just need to do a border run.
I dont understand, If you were not here for the last 5 years why bother ? Just come back on a tourist visa, stay 6 months and apply for dtv next year no ?