Are you on a Non-O for marriage because, if so, you can get a work permit with it then change the reason for your extension (assuming you are no longer on a visa) .You cancel a Non-O visa or Non-O extension by exiting without a re-entry permit if necessary
Doesn't the Dutch Embassy still do the income affidavit so you can get your 12 month retirement Extension of Stay using that? Note - you cannot switch from a retirement Non-O Visa to a marriage Extension of Stay for your first extension. You can change the reason for the extension in any subsequent year by meeting the requirements.