@Jim *******
yeah, I'm pretty sure the boyfriend status was a big factor in their failing, but since he couldn't be bothered to answer me I don't really know.
I was using soft language to avoid internet fighting - there is definitely no spouse visiting flavor of visa. I believe we've done ALL the things that can tip things in our favour, but there will still be a lottery element I am sure.
Married with husband living full time in Thailand, money, land, traveled out of the country and returned multiple times, etc... we will see.