Why do some members disrespect others in advice groups for expats in Thailand?

@Sam ********

I'm only a moderator, I'm not the admin. I don't make those decisions.

@Brandon ***********

Why not ask for that option to be enabled for the mod team so you can make the decisions? Easy fix

@Sam ********

I can do everything as a moderator. What I mean is that I don't set the official "policy" of the group.

@Brandon ***********

Why not just ask the admins to make it policy then? Again, super easy fix, just kick and ban any sarcastic dickheads and ornery geezers

@Danny ******

It wasn’t that sort of club but I don’t know a word to describe it. It’s called a resort and it’s just a bar where old expats hang out. Not like a Thai bar more like a pub.

@Brian *******

He’s the moderator (or, at least one of them). Telling him to leave is kind of counterproductive.

@Brandon ***********

- I think at this point you know how much I respect you. However, having needed to do searches in groups of late, I have to tell you that it’s not as easy as it once was. I don’t know if it’s a change in the FB algorithms or just the quantity of content.

The searches I’ve done were regarding:

- visas in Vietnam on a Vietnam group

- motorbike lessons in Vietnam

- property searches in a property group

- ***trying to find the window in which one can apply for a non-O visa extension in Bangkok***

For the last one, I searched this group as well as other visa pages. I could not find the answer, even though I know, for a fact, that I’ve seen this discussed multiple times over the years.

I am quite adept at using proper search terms. I’m a former sw engineer and long-term Facebook user. The search function is simply behaving differently. I did not ask my question, because I knew I would be attacked on the group. I don’t think a healthy group is one where long-term members are afraid to post.

@Brian *******

I prefer to help people that have real questions, thanks

@Brandon ***********

then just scroll on by. No problem at all.

@Brian *******

It is. I had to waste my time reading it. Along with countless others. Wasting cumulative hours of people's times. Because they didn't want to spend 5 minutes doing their own research.

@Brandon ***********

again, if this bugs you so much, leave the group. Easy peasy.

@Brian *******

you're telling a moderator to leave the group. Genius here

@Brandon ***********

so if it bugs you as much as you say, quit being a moderator. Really, you are making a big deal over nothing. Seems you are bringing on the stress yourself.

@David **********

no thank you. 🙂‍↔️ nope.

@Bonnie ********

Thank you for proving my point. Please point out the visa information on the first link found on your list. The proper link for the full site for the Thai embassy is Thaiembassy.org, not Thailandembassy.org. I don’t know what that link you posted is, but it looks a bit questionable. None of your links point to the right place.

Strange but if you click inside, it takes you to the appropriate Thai Embassy page.

Greg Hoff really? an implies there are more answer so this is THE answer from Chatgpt. What a ridiculous thing to say - this was meant to show the vast difference between Google and Chatgpt with the exact same question but apparently that doesn't interest you

@Kim ********

ChatGPT is not a static model. When asking anything but the most direct question, it can and will give different answers.

Source: I train these models for work.

But I guess that doesn’t “interessant” you. Believe what you want to believe.

@Greg *****

you never make typing mistakes? What an unsympathetic and arrogant fool you are

@Brandon ***********

very judgemental...do yiu know all the circumstances of the questioner?

It's easy to scroll on if the question is "stupid".

No question us stupid if uts relevant to the asker!

@Joseph ********

There are numerous stupid questions, and horribly stupid ones of late.

If people find this group, they can also help themselves. Who plans to visit a country (Thailand) without visiting the Thai Embassy website for their country.

Stupid questions are more plentiful than the scorn they rightfully generate.

@Bonnie ********

be like a Thai and dont respond to stupidity.

Thais often say more by saying nothing. Ditto

@Joseph ********

Why? That's condoning/inviting more bad behavior.

@Bonnie ********

This looks like the Thai embassy and is not. People have good reason to ask questions.

@Ruth ******

yes, that has long been confusing for newbies. In most countries a visa agency couldn't call themselves a name using the word "Embassy." I haven't looked at their site recently, but in the past the information that they shared wasn't always 100% up to date

@Ruth ******

It does not look like an embassy website.

@Joseph ********

if the question is relevant to them, and it's that important, they can spend 5 minutes doing a little research first.

@Brandon ***********

again presumptions re skills.

@Joseph ********

if they are skilled enough to open a Facebook account and post a question don't you think they are "skilled" enough to click on a browser icon and type a question?? Actually it requires 0 "skills"

@Kim ********

I don't judge because I get bamboozled at times.

If I can help I do!

If I carn't I scroll on!

No worse than asking where a building is when yiu are standing in fron of it and cannot see it.

Today I was in a large crowded market in Asia.

I was looking for an umbrella.

I was standing looking at one stall and a lady asked what I was looking for. When I responded "umbrella"!

She called over a young assistant and told me to follow......I was escorted to another tiny stall in a secluded part of the market to a stall that had about 6 folding umbrellas.

That's what I call help in real life.

No giving complicated directions....just follow OK.

@Brandon ***********

That’s kind of judgmental don’t you think?

@Brandon ***********

how are they "burdening thousands of other people with their question"? Has there been an epidemic of broken scrolling thumbs that I'm unaware of? Seriously, instead of being jerks people can just scroll on. It's not hard or burdensome at all.

@Brian *******

Because the thousands of other members in this group have to read their question because they were too lazy to do any work themselves.

@Brandon ***********

that isn't a burden on most people. You seem to need work on having patience and understanding.

@Brandon ***********

again, no need to be rude. If you don’t want to be burdened helping others, you could leave the site

@Stefani *******

You're being rude to the mod; what's your excuse?

@Stefani *******

what a foolish remark. Every day he helps a lot of people. And the answers are always top notch.

@Kim ********

I agree 100 %

@Stefani *******

if you look at past posts,

@Brandon ***********

has contributed thousands of knowledgeable posts helping many. He has not been rude or disrespectful. You need to get your facts straight before telling people to leave this group.

@Ken **********

indeed he has been helpful- 💯! but leadership would suggest keeping the knives out to a minimum and trying to create a peaceful group. I am shocked and disappointed but not… this was exactly the answer to OPs question ‘why is it like this?’ - well

@ ***************

y, because it’s allowed and now it’s received an empathetic stamp of approval. Cuz there’s a good reason to be rude. Wah. 🙄

@Ken **********

actually Brandon snaps at people somewhat regularly. He is absolutely a fountain of useful information, but has also become a cranky old man who is angry that people are on his lawn. Further, his ideas about google and Facebooks searchability are not in line with the experience of the masses. It is, often, not as simple as he wants to believe. And lastly, this is literally a forum for basic advice populated by people who are choosing to be here. AND (and this is the funniest part) Facebooks algorithm is an ASSHOLE. I almost NEVER see basic questions. So the theoretical number of unconvinced people is actually much lower than 75k but the best part is - he sees TONS of these posts because he interacts with them and Facebook assumes he likes them! The more you reply bitchily to a type of content the more Facebook is going to feed you that content. Brandon is creating his own problem.

@Jack ***************

You sound like you’ve been here a long time. As you’ve stated,

@Brandon ***********

has been the source of a wealth of information for a long time. However, you have to admit that the questions of late have really become rather tedious. The questions do seem to be more and more those that are not appropriate for a Facebook group.

While I absolutely agree that Google searches are not as easy as people think, nor are YouTube searches and watching through a whole lot of garbage content when trying to find something useful (I’m always annoyed when people tell posters to watch some YouTube videos without specific recommendations as to creators), some of the questions here lately have been absurd. Asking about weather in a certain month, when that is one thing one certainly can search, is silly. I understand why someone like Brandon, who tries to be truly helpful, might get a bit cranky.

On the other hand, I never see him attack the stupid questions. He, like I, likely just scrolls by. I think we have too many pointless posts, but I don’t mind scrolling by to help those who need it and be able to rely on this group when I do.

@Ruth ******

you say "I have to admit" but I don't because the fraction of the content Facebook shows me is not the same fraction it shows you and both of these are tiny fractions of the total content.

You are actually upset with Facebook because it is designed to show you more of what pisses you off.

@Jack ***************

I see every post because I'm an admin. And I have to approve every single post.

@Jack ***************

I follow this forum regularly and I am impressed with his thorough, well informed answers. I have not noticed sour answers. I regularly use internet search (not google) and ChatGPT for questions and the information is 90% correct but should be verified.

I do feel the posters who do not do any research on simple questions are entitled and lazy...but what can be done ?

@Jack ***************

you should be booted from the group for the questions you ask and this rude rant directed towards a moderator here

@Bonnie ********

or maybe they’re just not experienced traveling

@Sam ********

Some people don’t know they can search in Facebook. HOWEVER, they certainly should know they can search Google for questions like “what is the weather in April” and they’ll get more reliable answers than on Facebook.

On the flip side, many of the snarky people make the same “jokes” (if they can even be called such and the same people “like” or applaud them every time. How many times do we need smart alecks telling people they shouldn’t bring their wives on their vacations to Thailand…that has NOTHING to do with asking a question too many times. How many times do we need to a plethora of degrading comments in general about women?

I simply see many men who moved to Thailand trying to escape miserable lives and they just brought their misery with them. They then bully others thinking that making others miserable will make them feel superior. I’m sure they get a quick adrenaline rush, especially when they then get applause from other miserable people, but long-term they’re still miserable.

@Ruth ******

thank you. The string of explanations basically justifying belittling people is exactly what I expected to see. A prescribed amount of empathy? That’s why the world is like this. Absolute strangers coming to a place for exactly what the name invites them for doesn’t require empathy and no one is some humanitarian sharing advice in such a place 🤦🏻‍♀️ the rationalizing probably goes on for the rest of the 100 comments. I expected nothing less. This OP isn’t the first person to suggest it’s not necessary to insult and humiliate strangers, but this is SEA in a nutshell. The majority of western men are mediocre where they came from and elevated here and then they act like this.

It will really destroy your hope if you’re not careful 😔 I don’t have a prescribed amount of empathy’… that’s the silliest thing I’ve heard today. we have an endless supply, but not near as much as we do childish, mean arrogance. 😔

@Ellen ************

It’s not all of SEA. Honestly, you will find some expats like this throughout, but Thailand seems to attract the most. Unfortunately, it’s also currently my favorite location for other reasons, although recent policies along with this negativity are making other locations more and more appealing.

@Ruth ******

I’ve lived in Thailand and Vietnam both for extended periods of time- I suppose it is a bit worse in, Thailand but it’s just so ick.

@Ruth ******

You're right about miserable guys here, I've never met so many grumpy losers and ornery geezers in my life. I can't imagine being as mad at the world as some of these people are

@Ruth ******

I'm with you, it's a delicate balance that requires a bit of patience from everyone involved.